Gothic News: Linguistic Reformulation: Forthcoming Challenges in a Democratic Occupied Iraq

Linguistic Reformulation:
Forthcoming Challenges in a Democratic Occupied Iraq

(Gothic News Service, 5/08) The White House today announced the formal creation of "Lang-Ops," a joint division of State and War Departments with a direct mandate to take charge of the reconstruction of the Arabic language in Occupied Democratic Iraq.

"No, this is not an ethnocentric exercise, nor one of political manipulation," Brad Stevens, the new Lang-Ops Director responded at a news conference to an Arab reporter’s question. "This is all about re-invigorating Gulf Spoken Arabic with old and sound Mediterranean values of trade, commerce and opportunity. Like Iraq’s damaged oil fields and cities, Lang-Ops' most exciting task is to restructure Arabic to take full advantage of new technologies and business models that have fueled the success of western economies. On a most simple level, Lang-Ops will introduce the Arabic version of English words and phrases that will operate as catalytic agents in the goal of integrating Iraqi national aspirations with global economic interests."

When asked if this meant bringing business and other teachers from the United States to work in Iraq’s economic institutes and universities, the Director replied, "Of course. Fortunately our country is currently abundantly filled with former business executives who are entirely advanced in introducing and using the language and tools of potentially prosperous economies. Power Point, Excel – for examples - and other computer programs are already being revamped for bilingual Arabic and English classes - both on-site in Iraq and world wide on-line. Conceptually our Lang-Ops staff members have already been very busy creating correspondent Arabic language terms to stimulate an aggressive sense and use of concepts for "brand identity", "traction", "critical mass", and other terms for multiple micro-market global domination. You have to realize Iraq is a country that’s been more or less out of it for over thirty years."

"What about the language of democracy – values of free speech, consent of the governed, public assembling, voting, honoring foreign agreements, religious freedom, those kinds of things."

"First and foremost is to introduce the English-Arab terms for purposes of Iraq economic stimulus. This process is not much different than reconstructing an oil well and instituting a new management to control its world financial and delivery operations. Without the stimulus of a rebuilt Arabic in a way that represents economic opportunity for the liberated, old-fashioned democratic values are not worth a dime. In other words an Occupied Iraq first requires linguistic reformulation in a manner forceful enough to assure integration with our world’s economic interests. Success there will permit the evolution of democratic Arabic language values. I think you will also find our linguistic success will lead to the mitigation of resistance from certain religious and other counter-democratic forces."

The Lang-Ops Director went on to say that both State and War Departments are actively recruiting its first what will be called "Business Language Mentors (BLMs)" in both Silicon Valley and its counter-part in Massachusetts. "The executive talent pool in the High-Tech sector is particularly deep right now," the Director said without explanation. "We will have no trouble filling our Iraq Mentor Sites. Lang-Ops looks forward to an aggressive Arabic language reconstruction program."

Director Stevens refused to respond to a question as nothing but "offensive" when another Arab reporter asked whether or not Lang-Ops was part of an over-all State and War Department strategy to "re-cradle Arab civilization, including the origins of the Muslim faith."

Posted by Brian Stefans at April 09, 2003 09:59 AM | TrackBack